How do you defend your fellow country men and women for their ugliness, boldness and ingenuity. Every now and then I run into clumsy and embarressing situations like this:
After a hard day's job of nailing coffins- I am a carpenter who specialized in casket designing( I want you all to remember this because you will definitely need my services one day).I decided to 'chill out' with Ben - a very close pal of mine. What did we do? We went to The Yeates for a couple of pints. As we relaxed to savour the moment, a group of young black Africans entered the bar noisily. Going by their appearance - bushy-dusty-brownish-black hair, you could tell they were not Nigerians. At first glance, I estimated them to be from Darfur (Sudan) or presumably, Chad Republic- because one of them smiled while saying - 'hi' and I had a peep at his 'tar' stained teeth-a result of the permanent resinous effect of (gworo)kola-nut.( I for say dem be mallams; but mallams wen be like dis nor dey travel... abi I lie?).Anyway, one of them had the insolent audacity to come to our table uninvited and bellowed ''you are Nigerians''... and I said ''excuse me''... the cheeky bastard then rephrased by asking ''are you Nigerians? Ben and I looked at each other quizzically. It was Ben who was quick to retort ''what if we are...?''
This slimy stinking son of goon then shouted across the room to his comrade...'' they are Nigerians''... Ben and I looked at each other again.. This time, I removed my classes just to see properly who was talking . But these ''refugee-like'' fellows are not done yet. One of the associates of the impertinent intruder shouted back...'' you have to be careful, I hope you know where your phone is...'' As I was trying to place the accent, the import of the second guy's statement dawn on me... I slammed the table and yelled at the top of my voice ...'' what the hell is going on here... are you guys deliberately trying to work us up?''
At this point, the few people in the bar turned to look at us. One of the bar men came to our table to inquire what the problem was. And 'first intruder' quickly told him, there was no problem at all...' it was just a minor disagreement''. The white bar man not wanting to meddle in an all black argument hurriedly left us alone.
To save you the boredom of this windy story, 'first intruder' later introduced himself after considerable apology for his unruly behaviour. His name is Ngueso and they are from Lesotho, a ( tiny enclave) country in Soutern Africa.
Ngueso went on to tell us a shaky but pathetic story of how one Tosin- a Nigerian duped them of their house rent.
He told us that they worked with a small cleaning firm in Lewisham and Tosin the 'purported' Nigerian was their supervisor. He went on to narrate how they collectively gave Tosin one thousand, two hundred pounds(£1,200) about $2,078 for a three bed-room apartment which never materialized.
''Why did you people give this 'Tosin of a guy' that amount?'' Ben asked Ngueso.
To our amazement, Ngueso replied that he is not concern about the money. He said they would like to find out what exactly makes an average Nigeria tick.
''How do you mean, I asked''
Well, Ngueso explained, you see, the rest of Africa, I mean Africans are scared of Nigerians. ''You mean respect, I tried to correct him,''
No, no, I know what I am talking about.
''You see, he continued... I have had this discussion with Ghanians, Zimbabweans, Egyptians and even South Africans''. There seems to be a general uneasiness with these nationals wherever and whenever a Nigerian or Nigerians are amongst them.
Ben, in his Solomonic tone said ''Ngueso, I think you and your other African pals are suffering from 'nigeriaphobia'... which is the fear of Nigerians.
Ngueso will not give up.; He argued that he is not making an unfounded claim. He said Nigerians have a way of dominating any given space or situation. According to him, they don't like be led; they always want to be at the fore-front. To buttress his point further, he illustrated that the Tosin- who eloped with their rent, was the last person to join the cleaning firm where he works. But no sooner had he joined the firm than everything changed with his domineering attitude of... '' not like that, do it this way'' ...and before long, he was made a supervisor.
I could not help but marvel at Ngueso's line of argument. I then asked him...''do you have enormous respect for Nigerians''?
To this, he answered, ''I do respect Nigerians for their boldness and ingenuity but for their air of superiority, no! Other African nationals including myself, despise them.
All I could say was, '' I see''! I then asked him,'' don't you think Nigerians deserve to enjoy ''their feeling of superiority'', if they are bright, bold, beautiful and intelligent as you have agreed''?
''Thats the point I have been trying to get across''! Ngueso cried! How can one nation be so blessed with such enormous human resources? How? he queried!
Ben and I looked at each other for the umpteen time. We rest our case. Waiter, more beer please!
Are Nigerians really bold, beautiful, and intelligent? Or is Ngueso and the rest Africans according to him, flattering Nigerians?
Sunday, December 18, 2005
NIGERIANS ARE BOLD, BEAUTIFUL AND INTELLIGENT!
Posted by so-obscure at Sunday, December 18, 2005
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8 comments:
Hmm, they all love us, you have to admit that. I know is it not weird how you can tell a naija person from all other africans.
Want to wish you a MERRY XMAS AND A STUPENDOUS NEW YEAR.
MAY ALL YOUR DREAMS AND HOPES BE ANSWERED
Yo! I'm cracking up over here. This is a funny piece. No doub't, Nigerians are everything people say they are: BOLD, BEAUTIFUL & INTELLIGENT!
By the way, thanx for the holiday wishes my brova. I want to wish you the same and I hope you stay safe too.
I stumbled on this blog. After reading most of ur articles, i would say this.
When i read a prose written by Chinua Achebe, even without his name on it as the author, i would still know that it was written by Achebe... same for Soyinka.
You can't deny that you are not aristocrat. the one who bear 'obscurity' in the campus 'enquirer' in U.I.
I know your style.
boogie-1@yahoo.com
I think we love ourselves more than anything! Its the same thing when within Nigeria the Yoruba or Igbo feel superior its in our head. Not sure the other countries would agree though.
Hmmm so you are Obsurity from the Enquirer huh? Interesting.
Boogie, I appreciate your 'stumbling' on my blog, but there is a difference between 'obscurity' and 'so-obscure...'
I will clarify this when I send you an email.
Thanx.
There is truth in your prose and statement: NIGERIANS ARE BOLD, BEAUTIFUL AND INTELLIGENT; however, it appears Nigerians, as an entity, have not been able to strike a balance in projecting a more positive and productive aura and purpose.
You may want to drop your url at Nigerianblogger.com so that your blog will get aggregated with others, just a suggestion. Another place is AfricaBlog.com
Cool template...tough to find the comment link though.
Very cool design! Useful information. Go on! » »
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